Because—hah!—I get to go first!
Alas, I fear things have not gone at all well for the Slogar family this week. Professor Helena Slogar, in her continuing quest to create the perfect husband for her beloved daughter, Melissa, has once again hired itinerant gravedigger Elias E. Gorr to supply her with the . . . product . . . she needs. Elias, being a thoughtful and cautious man, waited until he was certain not to disturb any of the other visitors or the cemetery caretaker to carry out his job. That is to say, he went in the middle of the night.
But at the first turn of the shovel Elias was greeted by ghosts. They rose, howling and wailing, from the grave beneath his feet, demanding he leave them in peace. Elias soldiered on, for although thoughtful and cautious, he was also rather in need of a paycheck. He retrieved what he was sent for but was deeply traumatized by the incident. I fear he will not recover soon.
Sadly, Elias’s bravery and determination were all for naught. The brain he acquired for Professor Slogar was infected by disease. After Professor Slogar implanted it in Grogar he suffered from sores. Oozing, weeping sores cover poor Grogar’s entire furry little teddy-bear body. The brain was removed and discarded, but the sores linger. Poor Grogar. It would be such a shame if the sores proved fatal.
So right now the scores stand like this:
Lord Slogar 0
Professor Helena Slogar 0
Melissa Slogar 0
Elias E. Gorr -30
The Old Dam 0
Cousin Mordecai 0
Willem Stark 0
(This means I’m winning!)
If this is your first Gloomy Wednesday post, you might want to go back to the beginning. The first post is here, and to find others, click the Gloomy Wednesday link at the bottom of our home screen.
Next week: RB’s turn. She’s already proven this week she’s got the guts to be gory. Now let’s see if she has the cards.